Fifty shades of grey...or should I say "of sex"

This is the first time when I read a book and I feel I regress page by page. I do no understand how this book made it to the top. I understand how it became a best-seller as this is being driven by the audience (mainly housewives and teenage girls avid of sex) but I wouldn't go so far calling this erotic literature. This is not literature in the first place, full of slang ("Jeez" is Ana's favorite filler) and mediocre dialog. Erotic? Not sure...Vulgar would describe it better.

The book is about a college graduate falling in love with a young wealthy magnate who proves to have some issues...BDSM (bondage, discipline, sadism, masochism)...Jeez. Well, this will get very very cheesy because Christian is not only handsome and super hot, he also plays piano like a God, flies helicopters, gliders, private jets, drives sports car and of course, he is smart, right? Did I forget to say that Ana is poor and plain? Oh, sorry..yes, she is a jeans and Converse girl, reading Bronte and Austen. Ana interviews Christian...he is the sponsor of her university. He likes her. He "accidentally" meets her in a shop, then she's drunk in a bar, then she gets into his apartment, then they fuck once, then once again. I think they did it again in the morning, maybe several times. Did I just use the word "fuck"? Yes, of course...the books is overwhelmingly rich in this word..and above all, "they don't make love, they just fuck...hard."

And then I don't remember exactly the story because there is not much story to it..there is endless intercourse. There is a point where she graduates, then she visits her mother...[...]..then close to the end of the 500 pages they glide together (that was a nice chapter) and they split. Everything in between is just sex. Sex. SEX.

I will open the book randomly and I can bet £100 I will find some sex on that page. Let's try it. Shoot, I just lost £100. I'll try again.

He moves down to my belly – his tongue circling my navel – following the path of the flogger and the fur… I moan. He’s kissing and sucking and nibbling… moving south… and then his tongue is there. At the junction of my thighs. I throw my head back and cry out as I almost detonate into orgasm… I’m on the brink, and he stops.

No! The bed shifts, and he kneels between my legs. He leans toward the bedpost, and the cuff on my ankle is suddenly gone. I pull my leg to the middle of the bed… resting it against him. He leans over to the opposite post and frees my other leg. His hands travel quickly down both my legs, squeezing and kneading, bringing life back into them. Then, grasping my hips, he lifts me so that my back is no longer on the bed. I am arched, resting on my shoulders. What? He’s kneeling up between my legs… and in one swift, slamming move he’s inside me… oh fuck… and I cry out again. The quiver of my impending orgasm begins, and he stills. The quiver dies… oh no… he’s going to torture me further.

“Please!” I wail.

He grips me harder… in warning? I don’t know, his fingers digging into the flesh of my behind as I lay panting… so I purposefully still. Very slowly, he starts to move again… out and then in… agonizingly slowly. Holy fuck – please! I’m screaming inside… And as the number of voices in the choral piece increases, so does his pace, infinitesimally, he’s so controlled… so in time with the music. And I can no longer bear it.

“Please,” I beg, and in one swift move, he lowers me back onto the bed, and he’s lying on top of me, his hands on the bed beside my breasts as he supports his weight, and he thrusts into me. As the music reaches its climax, I fall… free fall… into the most intense, agonizing orgasm I have ever had, and Christian follows me… thrusting hard into me, three more times… finally stilling, then collapsing on top of me.

Here we go...it feels like porn consumption to me. Expectably, it is a very fast reading..On average it would take me 2 weeks to read 500 pages if the book is interesting (I like making notes, pondering, using a dictionary for the new words). This reading didn't require the diligence. It took me 4 days...partly because it doesn't require any processing, and partly because I had 12 hours of car driving and 6 hours of train over the past 4 days...so that was plenty of time for an undeserving book.

One interesting thing about this book is that it has soundtrack music...the characters listen to the music as they "develop the story". I must admit some of the music is exquisite and it helps portraying the atmosphere and energy..

2 - this book taught me what "commercial" really is.

"Laters, baby."